Just found your valuable comment amongst a sea of spam. Thank you for taking time to further the conversation.

As women, we are naturally good at relationship, nurturing, merging, tending, and caretaking. For so many of us the challenge is how to be cooperative and nurturing without ignoring our own independence and personal needs. We often place others first and so the lesson for many of us is to be true to ourselves and to speak up with tactfulness. Until the lesson is learned, we will find ourselves again and again in situations where this lesson presents itself.

If we don’t take good care of ourselves, how can we even hope to make all of our loved ones’ lives a better place? As you say, 80/20 certainly isn’t an equal partnership. Perhaps another question for us all to ask ourselves is, “How can I bring a harmonic balance to my own life and the lives of my loved ones?”

I am reminded of this wise quote: “You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” ~ Buddha

I most value my family and the majority of my energy goes to activities related to making our lives a better place. So much of what I take on though is crushing me, while taking pressure off them. There is so much more I accept responsibility for in our marriage or house upkeep etc. because I know I’ll get it done and it won’t overburden DH. Hmmm….what about me? 80/20 isn’t really a partnership.